Category Archives: Thoughts & Such

Prison to Freedom

This video is from the program in the prison that enabled us to visit and speak to the ladies in the prison.  I have a whole post prepared of my story, but I wanted to share this by itself.  Mainly because it tells their story, not mine.  Even having been there, knowing so much of what is in the video, I can’t do justice to the feeling of change and hope among these women, women who are complete strangers but have that ‘something’ about them.  It’s amazing how that works, how a power mightier than anything else can take women who will quite possibly die in prison free of a life of pain and turmoil within the bounds of bricks and barbed wire.

During our trip, we were able to meet some of these women.  It was amazing to meet women who had truly been changed.  It brings a new meaning to the word for me.  I’ve studied psychology and have taken a special interest in seeking to understand people who have committed terrible crimes.  For whatever reason, I have always wanted to understand the reasons behind their actions.  Over time, I’ve sought out the common denominator and found it repeatedly to be brokenness.  No matter the background, no matter the personality, a deep rooted emptiness seems to sit at the bottom of us.  Fortunately, not all of us have come to the point that the men and women in prison see.

If you’d like to learn more about this program, see more of the amazing videos, or even donate to help this amazing program, click here.

Originally posted 2013-10-26 05:37:32.

I’m Going to Prison

prisonI will soon be leaving to go to a prison to minister to the women there.  I’m not special, just average like just about anyone else.  That’s why I need your help.  I would love to have you pray for me, the other women going as well as those who we speak to.

I’ve been to a lot of prisons and jails throughout my life.  Mostly to visit family, a couple of times because I forgot to pay fines, those trips were shortlived but sucked butt.  Thanks be to God we had help to take care of those quickly!  Though at the time it didn’t feel like quick enough.

Going to speak to women who are in the process of spending a long period of time to pay for their mistakes has put a lot of thought in me.  We all pay for our mistakes one way or another, whether it is one that lands us in jail, one we managed to ‘get away with,’ or one that wasn’t serious enough for the justice system.  I am praying that God speakthrough me, to help those women heal.

Having been through a lot and having studied a good bit of psychology and criminals, I have learned that there is always some reason that people turn out to do what they do, in my experience it stems from pain.  I know drug addicts and alcoholics who are haunted by things so deeply that it’s their excuse to escape.  I’ve read about violent criminals who grew up desperate for love.  All they ever wanted was for someone to love them, only they didn’t realize that was the source of their anger or the cause of the problem until it was ‘too late’.  I’m super thankful that I didn’t end up in those situations.  I believe the quote is ‘but for the grace of God go I’, and that seems to be the one that fits.

To sum it up, the ladies and I (50 altogether) could use your prayers as we go to minister the women there.  I know that odds are I will get some sort of blessing, probably more than the blessing I’m trying to give those women.  I am thankful that God has put me in a place where I can at least try to help.  The Bible says God doesn’t necessarily call the equipped, but rather he equips those He calls (Hebrews 13:21) so I have faith that it will all work out.  😀 Thank you for your prayers, love and support.

Originally posted 2013-10-11 06:00:30.

Super… me???

Hey everyone!  Today was super busy.  I spent it helping my Mom and dealing with my narcolepsy.  Blah!  I thought I would be able to post tomorrow, so that wasn’t too bad, unfortunately, I was wrong.

Tomorrow I will be running around crazy again helping someone else.  I hope you’ll take some time and enter our giveaways, add some to the linky, and check out our past recipes as I’ve not got much energy left today…  Hopefully tomorrow will be more productive!

I will tell ya this, hang in there with me, hang out, comment, and I swear I’ll have at least one, maybe even two giveaways up for you soon!

Love and prayers!

Kaycee

Originally posted 2013-09-23 21:49:54.

Empowered A Learning Journey with @LysaTerKeurst

recite-20365-49793719-1pxzr7p

 

A little back story, my life has taken a detour that I’m not happy with.  I’m not even sure what the detour is or what caused it, all I know is I’m off track.  So, I have been throwing myself at the mercy of God.  And just in case I forget to toss myself his way, I’ve joined two Bible study groups (one focusing on exploring in depth the book of Mark, the other going through a Christian based learning objective about cravings).  This post is about the second.

We are going through the book Made to Crave by Lysa TerKeurst.  You can check out her site if you want, she has a 21 day devotional there that you may enjoy.  It’s not a dieting thing, or a ‘lifestyle change’, but rather an exploration of a base set of feelings and helping us to overcome our own demons.  For me, that would be food and cigarettes.  I was supposed to have quit, but frequently I find myself having ‘just one’.  Prayers welcome and I’m still working on it!

Anyway, we had our first group meeting (though I don’t think you have to have a group to do the study).  It was pretty enlightening.  She brought up some great points that have began to change my perspective.  This weeks word is Empowerment.  I can’t quite recall exactly why it is Empowerment, but I think it had something to do with knowledge being the first step to empowerment, and empowerment being the key to overcoming.

If you’d like to go through this book with us, I’d love to go back and forth with you.  I just started today, but I will happily go back and go over any of it again if you join in later.  If nothing else, check out the devotional.  I’m doing the 60 day devotional and day 1 was quick and simple yet very thought provoking.

Yes, today, I am feeling empowered.

My God bless you and keep you.

Originally posted 2013-09-09 09:31:28.

Trust: A Venting Session

I have no idea why we, as human beings, ever go against our natural instincts.  Animals don’t.  Ever.  That’s why they say animals can sense evil.  It’s not that they sense evil, they just trust their own instincts.  They don’t fill their heads with worry and concern over whether or not it’s the right decision, they just listen to what God tells them through their instincts.

I made the mistake of going against my natural instinct because my heart was screaming to do so.  I knew better, I have since done better.  Last night my instincts were confirmed for an event that took place a while back.  The wound of betrayed trust hurts even now.  I’m hurt and angry, and somehow not quite as surprised.  I wish I could say otherwise.

The kids like to say ‘epic fail’.  I hear it all the time out of their little heads.  So, in the interest of irony, my heart’s judgement was an epic fail.

Yesterday I didn’t post, I don’t have much of an excuse.  I just didn’t do it.  Today I’m venting.  Perhaps tomorrow will be normal again. 

Originally posted 2013-08-25 09:24:51.

Divorce.

DivorceNormally I don’t do this, but today I’m going to make an exception.  I’m hurting and I need to express myself.  I don’t want my family to feel guilty so I’m expressing it to you.  😀  Prayers welcome.

My parents divorced when I was little.  I honestly don’t remember what it was like having two married parents so usually it doesn’t bother me.  There were things that thoroughly sucked growing up with divorced parents, a LOT of them, but I’m grown now and I have long ago accepted that my parents just weren’t meant to be.  Apparently I was some sort of silver lining in the storm that became of their marriage.  Whatever.

divorce (1)My Mom has had a couple of failed marriages since then and a few more bad relationships but my Dad managed to find someone he loves and stay happily married living for God.  My Momma causes drama, I get that and I’m not even going to go there right now.  I will say this, apparently she wished my Dad a happy former anniversary or some crap a few years back and one of my little sisters (born from my Dad and StepMom) had the audacity to blame me and say it was because I wanted them back together.  That just made me angry, they have NO idea what it’s like to deal with divorced parents, the feelings of rejection or what it was like to watch your parents fight, screaming and yelling, when you are too little to even know what’s going on.

Yep, that’s it, I miss THAT, because that is ALL I remember from my Mother and Father being married.  FIGHTING.  No good memories whatsoever.  In fact, I have very few good memories growing up.  The ones I do have came not from my parents but from my Grandparents and one of my Aunties who has always been such a blessing to me and I took for granted for so long.

Anyway, I got over that.  Mostly.  I just don’t think about it.  I told my sister what I thought about her stupid comment that was wrapped in pure ignorance and I’ve moved on.  Really.  I’m not even upset with her anymore because I understand that the comment came from emotion and a lack of knowledge.

Today, however is apparently my Great Grandmother’s 90th birthday party.  Guess how I found out?  A friggin’ picture on facebook of the amazing cake my Auntie done for her.  I’m use to feeling left out but I guess it’s been so long that this one snuck up on me.  I Maybe it’s because I love my Granny so MUCH and would have LOVED to be there to celebrate with her.  Whatever it is, I sit here venting to you (my husband calls it screaming into the void, and I get it because I’m sure most people stopped reading 2 paragraphs ago) and crying because if I say anything to my family it’s just going to hurt them and I don’t want them to hurt the way I do or even worse continue feeling sorry for me because ‘Poor little Kaycee was innocent in the situation and it wasn’t fair for her’.  I got sick of hearing that a long time ago.  It really, really didn’t help.  I know it came from a place of love, but it wasn’t helpful at all.  I knew my situation, I lived it.  Can’t tell my husband because he will eventually comment to my family how much it hurts me when my Dad forgets that he has a kid out here.  That wasn’t a fair comment, I know my Dad loves me.  I’m just hurting.

I ask you now for prayers, I know I serve a healing and restorative God.  If you don’t believe in God, or are in doubt, I wish I knew how to show you what an amazing God He truly is.

If not prayers, I’ll take positive energy or whatever it is you do for the people you want to help.  I’m hurting right now and it sucks.  That is all.

Originally posted 2013-08-10 12:07:09.

Getting Personal: Confessing My Crazy

crazy88

I took that ‘Are you open’ quiz and got 48%.  I guess that’s okay, but as a blogger I thought I should be WAY more open than that.  If nothing else, then with my readers!  Besides, if you don’t like it, what are you gonna do?  Throw tomatoes?  I guess stop reading, and that would stink, but all things must end eventually, right???

In honor of that sentiment, and to throw it in their face that I’m not JUST 48% open (though who knows, maybe this is part of my 48) I decided to share some of my crazies with you…  Things that most people don’t know, that I really don’t tell them, and that you are now privy to.  Feel free to share your crazies, as perhaps it will take some of the red off my face!  LOL.

1. I talk to people that aren’t here, like the other day I was looking for my keys and was very excited when I thought I found them (I hadn’t) so I say out loud (to my husband) “Yeah, I found them…  They were in my jeans pocket…”  I didn’t.  They weren’t.  And he wasn’t here…

2.  If TatorBug (my dog) is in the laundry basket I need in, I make him a bed in another one then move him…  He typically jumps back after I’m done if there are still clothes in it…

3.  I hide things, REALLY well!  So well, in fact, that I frequently lose them for very long periods of time…  Like  a Christmas present from last year I found 8 months later…..

4.  Even if I don’t like something, I don’t want to throw it away….  It actually bothers me to do so…

5.  If a paper gets bent or creased it drives me insane.  I can’t stand it.  No clue why…  Just don’t bend the paper…  It is REALLY not necessary to bend it!

6.  I am very outspoken…  That being said, I am secretly terrified someone won’t like me.  I could trace that back to something I’m sure, but it’s just weird that I speak so much of my mind but am constantly scared someone won’t like me…  I had hoped I would outgrow that one…

7.  I am so scared of failure that I quit when things get tough…  Yeah, there’s one for ya…  Don’t think that one is crazy, just makes me a chicken.  This confession hurts a little…

 

 

 

Originally posted 2013-07-25 06:46:47.

Why I’m Having an #IconicSummer #Sponsored

iconic2

This summer Pepsi is asking what is making our summers iconic.  I thought long and hard about what my answer would be.  My Monkey’s and I will be making a trip literally to the other side of the country (granted, we do live in the middle) and that seemed like the iconic memory for the summer.  As  I continued thinking, I realized what has already made my summer iconic.

I guess I will start from the beginning.  Well, sort of.  Long, long ago two girls somehow managed to become best friends.  Sisters.  A dramatic birthday catastrophe took average elementary school playmates and began a transformation into a deep, true friendship.  Unfortunately, adolescent stupidity pushed us apart.  In her defense, it was pretty much all my stupidity…  We can skip over that and save it for another day.

That stupidity took us apart for almost 10 years.  During that time, my heart yearned for our friendship.  I constantly found myself missing her, worrying about her, longing for a piece of me that was missing.

In the past year or so, we caught up.  Really, we just finally got our heads out of our butts and got together.  Through the years, we’ve had moments where we saw each other and talked for a moment, but we never made the time to find that lost love we shared.  A few weeks ago, we packed up and took our kids camping.  Me, her and 4 Monkeys roughed it at the creek for a few days.  Laughter, memorable moments, creepy pedo-man, a raccoon and a mudfight later we thrived.  Perhaps not physically, as I was super sunburned the day we managed to get the suntan lotion on the kids but not us.  Emotionally though, I feel whole again.  I am no longer missing something.

So, my summer is iconic because my best friend and I have reconnected. You know it’s true friendship when you can just pick up where you left off and everything feels the same!  I love that girl!

#sponsored Post: I’m required to disclose a relationship between our site and Pepsi. This could include the Pepsi providing us w/content, product, access or other forms of payment.

For every picture uploaded, Pepsi will donate to charities that support military and families in need and you’ll get a chance to win an iconic summer experience.  So get going, use the link below!

Originally posted 2013-07-10 20:02:35.

A Father’s Day Tribute

 30514_551164240994_7683749_n 30514_551164236004_1406402_n

34111_554955328624_1370633_n

 

 

Today, I am heading to spend the day with my Dad and my Pa-Pa, along with the rest of my amazing family.

5 Things I Got From My Dad

Not in Any Particular Order

  1. I deflect emotional junk with humor.  
  2. My height
  3. Big feet
  4. That ‘close your eyes when you smile’ thing.
  5. An amazing example of how to live for God, even if sometimes you stumble.

5 Random Memories that Make Me Smile

  1. My Dad fixing my pony tails when I was a kid.  Thank God I wasn’t tender headed!
  2. Watching my Dad lay carpet and kick the knee thingy.  I was always fascinated to watch my Daddy work, and now I love the smell of new carpet!
  3. When I was a kid, he was rotten.  Once, we went to McDonald’s and got food.  He said we needed to let it cool and we ran into the store.  When we came back, my burger somehow magically had gummy worms on it…  He said we shouldn’t eat there because they put worms on their food.  LOL.  Love my Dad’s humor, and that even now 20+ years later he swears it was them.
  4. That time when my world crashed around me and I called him in the middle of the night.  He not only got out of bed and spoke to me for hours, he gave me a lot of wisdom that night.  In essence, I love that if I need him, he is always there for me.  He doesn’t try to sugar coat, he is just honest.
  5. When he walked me down the aisle informing me that the truck was running by the door if I wanted to run.  LOL.  As if I would have made it away from my husbands linebacker family and friends.  LOL.  Refer back to that deflecting emotion with humor.

Not that you hadn’t figured it out, but I love my Dad.

Hope you have a great day celebrating the amazing, loving Dad in your life.

May God Bless You and Keep You.

Originally posted 2013-06-16 00:01:12.

Stop Puppy Mills—It Starts With YOU


Pet stores that care about puppies don’t sell them. That’s because the majority of pet stores that sell puppies carry dogs from cruel and inhumane puppy mills. Puppy mills are like dog-making factories with the mother dogs spending their entire lives in cramped cages or kennels with little or no personal attention or quality of life. When the mother and father dogs can no longer breed, they are discarded or killed. Consumers who purchase puppies from pet stores or over the Internet without seeing a breeder’s home firsthand are often unknowingly supporting this cruel industry.

Keep Reading!

Originally posted 2013-06-04 13:05:22.